Help me please, I need motivation

I've never been one for exercising, even when I was skinny.  Can't stand gyms or any organized exercise programs!  I used to be more sporty and exercised that way, but now I can't do any of that because I'm too fat!!  The sporty stuff I always found more entertaining and enjoyable, but I'm too fat to do that stuff now.  I have to resign myself to the fact that I have to actually EXERCISE, bugger it sounds horrible.  Help!! I need support and the motivation to do it!!!

Being fat sucks,
Fatty McFatterson

Oh crap I'm back I think!

So, I've never really gotten into the hang of this blogging thing.  I love reading other peoples blogs, but I can't seem to get the motivation enough to keep up with my own!  Maybe it's because I can't do it at work - damn IT nazi's!!  Maybe it's because I know that nobody reads my mindless drivel, but it's also the pressure I put on myself to be interesting/amusing.  I started this blog as a journal of my weight loss journey, the journey has really not started yet.  Fucking procrastination, the mantra of my life!!  Although I have ordered Tony Horton's Ten Minute Trainer and maybe it'll help more than any other fitness systems for me.

Stay strong fat friends!!
Fatty McFatterson

Why is it illegal to kill men?

Damn it, why is it always ok for the man to be a total ass and get away with it? What's good for the goose is never good for the gander! I'm so bloody frustrated with the MFB that I don't know what to do anymore. Why am I never right, and why is he!!! Thank god for 2 t.v.'s and separate bedrooms.

I hate stupid people

Why is it that nowadays no one can make a bloody decision on their own? Or for that matter be proactive enough to solve a small, and I do mean small problem by themselves.

So fed up with CW#1 who has been working with me for 5 yrs and still won't make a decision on her own, she has severe almost bordering on obsessive CYA syndrome. Fuck! My job isn't to sit there all day and answer all of your really stupid and inane questions!!!

CW#2 is a fucking moron! Likes to think that she's much more intelligent and important then she really is. This one also likes to ask the stupid questions, but her CYA syndrome is not as well defined as the other. She'd have to be smart for that to happen. This one likes to question and second guess all of what you say, totally pisses me off. Do what I say, you're not the one that's going to get shit for it anyway!

I don't have time for this crap, and I'm so fed up with their bs that I think it may be time for new CW's.

I'm not saying I'm perfect or never make mistakes, but this really has to stop. I can't kill them, but I dream of it often.

Tim Hortons can suck my left one...If I were a guy

It's that time again in Canada, the great roll up the rim to win at Timmy's. Unfortunately for me, it's roll up the rim to lose! Since the bloody thing started I have had 16 extra large double doubles, and not a friggin winner in the lot! I mean c'mon already, not even a frickin cheap ass donut, wtf is up with that. I do remember last year starting out to a pretty dismal display, but seriously, 16 coffees and not one frickin winner??? I average 2 a day, sometimes 3, the odds should be on my side, right? I guess not! I wonder, does anyone else have the same horrible luck at this crap as me? This is where the title of the post comes in, I told the BF on the way home yesterday that if I was a guy I would tell Timmy's to suck my left nut! Being such a loyal and devoted customer, I think they should.

The battle sucks!

Yeah, so I sounded like an ungreatful bitch in the last post. I know that there are millions of other people in the world who have it way worse than me. I've never thought that I was the most hard done by person on the planet, but we all have crappy issues in life, don't we? I wasn't bitching because I can't have the designer anything that I may want. I don't give a shit about designer crap! I'm not destitute or diseased, I guess I'm just fed up. I don't need constant affirmation, I just need some affirmation. I guess when you don't get any, a little goes a long way. Believe me, the last thing I expect to hear is...WOW you're looking really thin lately. That ain't gonna happen anytime soon! I'm guessing when you work with your BF and he's one of the bosses, but not your direct supervisor, that work inevitably streams into your personal life, I know it has for me. That's what gets me down the most, I just want to feel a little appreciated, not always criticized. It still makes me feel underappreciated and worthless a lot of the time, but what the hell am I supposed to do about it. You tell me!

The bigger battle

Not about the weight, about the life! Tonight is one of those nights that I feel like dying and couldn't give a shit about living, skinny or fat. Can someone just say something nice to me for once? I just want to hear that my life isn't worth giving up on, but right now I'm not feeling it. Just wish I felt appreciated at all, in any little way. All I want to say is FUCK IT ALL.